The Sultan Returns: Blame NATO and a Parking Ticket, But We’re Back!

We know, we know—you’ve been asking, nay, DEMANDING, an event with The Sultan, and we sincerely apologize for the delay! Between rubbing elbows at the NATO Summit (they insisted on having The Sultan’s sage wisdom, obviously) and battling the endlessly dramatic United States v. The Sultan parking ticket saga (we couldn’t rest until justice prevailed), it’s been quite the whirlwind. But fear not, noble citizens, for we are never too busy for YOU. Let’s finally meet and make up for lost time!

Saturday, December 7th – El Centro, California, USA

Mark your calendars and prepare for spectacle: The Sultan and an entourage of Slowjamastan dignitaries will grace the City of El Centro’s annual Christmas Parade. This year’s theme, “Christmas Traditions Around the World,” couldn’t be more fitting—we’re absolutely thrilled to educate our American neighbors on how we Slowjamastanis celebrate the holiday season (hint: we roast Crocs and peel egg-nog infused string cheese!) The parade kicks off at 10 AM on Main Street and 8th Street in downtown El Centro. Be there, or forever wonder what Slowjamastani holiday magic you missed!

Sunday, December 8th – Highway 78, California, USA

Our dedicated Sultan is rolling up his sleeves for the “Highway 78 Clean-Up Extravaganza” just beyond our borders. While our litter-happy American neighbors may love fast food and even faster littering, we Slowjamastanis will rise above—and pick up their mess! We will provide you with the vests, the pickers, and the sense of moral superiority. Raffles, party favors, and refreshments await as we restore Highway 78. Limited spots available, so RSVP now and help make the highway slightly less disgusting! RSVP HERE.