BY THE SULTAN l SUPREME LEADER
December 1, 2023
Dublândia: December 1st, 2023 marks the two-year anniversary of independence for The People’s Republic of Slowjamastan. It was on this very day, exactly two years ago, that The Sultan – accompanied by his best friend, Mark Corona – signed the now famous Declaration of Independence, on a newly acquired, 11-acre strip of barren land in the Southern California desert. With just a big green sign and an old desk we found on OfferUp, we launched a nation. What would unfold over the next two years, we could never even have imagined. Here are five things we’ve learned since independence…
1. Holy Crap, it’s Expensive Running a Nation
It’s like having a baby! It sounded fun, but you don’t realize how expensive it’s going to be until it’s too late…and you can’t give it back! The cost of the land was just the beginning! Merch, uniforms, websites, printing, graphic design, insurance, security cameras, etc. It literally never stops. This is not a complaint, just an observation. Slowjamastan was probably the worst financial decision of my life, but no regrets! Just don’t be surprised if, as a citizen of Slowjamastan, you eventually receive a tax bill from me!
2. If You Build it, They Will Come
Two years later, we have more than 16,000 citizens! Here’s the part where The Sultan thanks you profusely for being a part of Slowjamastan! Thank you for your citizenship, your support and your loyalty! A special thanks to all of our Governors, Governesses, Parliament Members and Ambassadors, whose contributions literally helped build our nation. And thanks to the under 100,000 people who have made the physical pilgrimage out to Slowjamastan to join us for our events. We may not have a Ferris wheel like Coachella, but we have raccoons!
3. There are Others Like us!
We certainly weren’t the first to launch a “micronation,” and we won’t be the last. There are dozens (maybe hundreds) of other “special” people like The Sultan who have formed their own countries. Over the last two years, we’ve had the pleasure of meeting many other “World Leaders” from micronations around the world, and feel so happy to have met so many great, new friends.
4. Some Get it, Some Don’t
The funniest part of satire is watching the 1% of folks who don’t understand satire. It’s actually very entertaining. Consider yourself part of a very special club: You’re “in” on this. You get to watch the confused look on people’s faces at work after you tell them you have dual citizenship with the world’s newest country…or act surprised when the bartender tells you he doesn’t accept Dubles. Our life feels richer since the creation of Slowjamastan, and we hope yours does, too!
5. If You Can Dream it, You Can do it
I remember a motivational speaker coming to my fifth grade class who delivered this line, and it stuck: If you can dream it, you can do it! This is true in the case of Slowjamastan and we know it’s true for you! A little over two years ago, I called Mark and said, “Dude, I bought some desert land four hours away…meet me there and let’s do something cool with it!” And here we are today, with more citizens than two recognized countries, over 1,000 news features in 100+ countries, and a wall full of awards and commendations.
There’s so much more to come in 2024. We hope you’ll continue to be a part of Slowjamastan. There are so many ways to be an active Slowjamastani: by joining us at our events (both inside and outside The Motherland), interacting on our social media channels, and simply spreading the Slowjamastan gospel to friends and strangers alike. Slowjamastan just doesn’t live out in the far away desert, Slowjamastan lives in your heart. ¡Viva Slowjamastan!