How I Survived Afternoon Tea with a Sultan: A Tale of Tea, Turbans, and Timely Bowing READER CONTRIBUTION l BEN KATZMAN SLIGHTLY EDITED BY THE SLOWJAMASTAN MINISTRY OF PROPAGANDA May 26th, 2024 San Diego: I am
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Nation’s Smelliest Sea Rebranded as Tribute to Supreme Leader: “Sultan” Sea to Replace Salton Sea in Grandiose Gesture BY HARVEY SCHMIDLAP l STAFF WRITER May 19th, 2024 Salton City, CA: This week, a measure was put
Sultan Achieves Board Game Fame BY HARVEY SCHMIDLAP l STAFF WRITER May 10th, 2024 El Centro, California, United States of America: Slowjamastanis collectively threw their hands up in joyous celebration upon discovering that their illustrious nation had
Sultan Urges Serenity as Outraged Citizens Demand Answers BY HARVEY SCHMIDLAP l STAFF WRITER May 9th, 2024 Dublândia: In a shocking turn of events in The Republic of Slowjamastan, a nation known for its strict fashion laws and
Land-locked micronation surrounded by California welcomes its first naval vessel BY CASEY MEAD l SLOWJAMASTAN SPINDERELLA AND HIGH PRIESTESS OF HOTDAMASTAN April 27th, 2024 This past weekend, citizens and visitors attending a celebratory event in
Breaking News: Parking Ticket Sparks Tension Between Slowjamastan and United States BY HARVEY SCHMIDLAP l STAFF WRITER April 9th, 2024 San Diego: In a shocking turn of events, the unbreakable bond between Slowjamastan and the United
Royal Intervention: Sultan Enlists San Diego DA in Battle Against Contraband Clown Shoes BY HARVEY SCHMIDLAP l STAFF WRITER April 6th, 2024 In a scene reminiscent of a B-movie diplomatic crisis, the Sultan rolled out the
Sultan’s Stroke of Genius: Artist Neil Myers Appointed Minister of Oil and Paint BY HARVEY SCHMIDLAP l STAFF WRITER March 30th, 2024 In a move that has left the art world spinning on its easel, The
🚨 GIVEAWAY ALERT 🚨 Play Tuesday Night Trivia for a Chance to Win a Trip to Slowjamastan or up to $1,000 Cash! Introducing Slowjamastan’s Tuesday Night Trivia , a live and interactive online game show taking place every
BY HARVEY SCHMIDLAP l STAFF WRITER February 28th, 2024 Dublândia: Have you heard? We’re giving away up to $1,000 cash or a trip to Slowjamastan during Tuesday Night Trivia : a live,
BY HARVEY SCHMIDLAP l STAFF WRITER February 28th, 2024 Dublândia: Concerned citizens, passers-by and even American law enforcement agencies are showing growing concern over the unidentified and gargantuan steel object currently being constructed inside the borders of
BY HARVEY SCHMIDLAP l STAFF WRITER February 28th, 2024 Dublândia: The meddling foreign media often gets us “wrong,” as evidenced in so many “fake news” reports about our great nation. This month,